My Name is Trixy Deans and I am a crossdresser.

Well this blog is about me or to be more precise the feminine side of me who goes by the name of Trixy Deans. Why Trixy Deans you might ask, well at the time that I was starting my online presence I obviously needed a feminine name, Trixy Deans just popped into my head (more about things popping into my head later) it reminded me of Dixie deans who was an old Everton footballer which is strange in itself as I am a Manchester United fan.   Well as my online presence has grown over the years it has become more difficult to change the name so I am stuck with it.

So anyway, my name is Trixy Deans and I am a crossdresser.

A recent picture

It all began at the tender age of 9  the first item of feminine attire that I wore was my sisters black swimming costume she was 11 at the time. As the years passed I graduated to my sister’s and mother’s underwear I only dressed in panties, slips and pantyhose, I suffered from the usual guilty feelings after each session, and no matter how many times I told myself never again, I always would return to my sisters or mother underwear draw with their treasure trove of silky delights.

On leaving school I moved to London to work for the world’s favourite Airline as an engineering apprentice,  so my dressing came to an abrupt halt as I was cut off from my supply of underwear.

For the next 17 years my dressing sessions were limited to the wearing my girlfriends and eventually my wife’s underwear in secret.

My first wife passed away at an early age from breast cancer and I was a young father with two young children. I met and fell in love with a girl who was 10 years my junior, and we eventual married. At the start of our relationship I confessed to her my desire to dress as a woman. She was shocked at first but has been supportive ever since. The only rules that she has put in place are  not in front of the children (we had three more) and never in public, that was 30 years ago this year.

Well my dressing progressed sporadically over the years but really flourished when I spend a couple of years living and working apart from my family. I lived alone in a small flat so was able to dress at will. It was during this period that I stared to accumulate my own cloths and first experimented with make-up and wigs. It was also at this time that I realised that I wanted to look as feminine as possible and that looking like a bloke in a dress was no longer enough.

Well the family and I were eventually reunited so my dressing opportunities were limited once again. This situation continued for a few years until once again I was living and working apart from my family. During the next 3 years my dressing really took off and I acquired a large wardrobe and honed my makeup skills.

Once again, I was back living with my family and have never worked away from them since. With the kids at home dressing opportunities were again limited. This situation continued for the next 8 years. Things changed for the better when I was able to work a couple of days a week from home which meant that I was finally alone in an empty house so my dressing opportunities flourished once again.  I still had to be aware of when the kids, still living at home, would be coming home from work or college. There was an element of surprise in their return times which led to a few close calls (more of that in later posts.)

A picture from 2014 the start of my final journey

So, since 2013 I am able to dress almost at will and with the advent of online shopping I have built up a large and varied wardrobe. I still consider myself to be a football loving golf playing man who likes to become a girly girl every now and then. I remember having a conversation with my wife in the car around the time of the Caitlin Jenner story and I told here don’t worry dear I don’t want to do a Caitlin.

Well that enough for now


On the Same Wavelength

My wife and I are generally on the same wavelength on most things but today we were in sync with regards to my crossdressing.  My wife currently works the afternoon shift so I have the house to myself from 11 am to 4 pm on the days that she works.

One from the salvaged day

I was looking forward to an afternoon of Trixy time when my wife announced that a lady from the local dog shelter would be coming to pick up a box of stuff that she was donating. She did not know when the lady would be calling but it would be sometime during the day.

Well to say I was crestfallen at the prospect of missing Trixy time, would be an understatement so I started to think of ways of recovering the situation. I decided that should the young lady not arrive before my wife left for work, I would leave the box outside the front door so that when she arrived, she would see it and take it away without disturbing Trixy.

Well, it all turned out fine when the you lady came and took the box away well before my wife left for work.

After she had left, and this is the point of this post, my wife said to me

“I am so pleased that she came before I left for work otherwise, I would have had to put the box outside the front door and text the lady to say that my husband had gone to work.”

A lovely new dress

Now we don’t often speak about my crossdressing but my wife is fully aware of what I do when I am alone at home but for here to think of the same solution to my Trixy problem as I had shows  just how attuned and on the same wavelength, we are LOL.   

After a long day in heels what better way to rest your feet than in a pair of comfy slipper LOL


I guess that at some point in our crossdressing journeys we have all experienced that moment when we step in front of the mirror and the person staring back at us is for a brief moment a stranger, a beautiful stranger.

For me it doesn’t happen often but when it does it takes my breath away, my most recent breathless moment was yesterday and some of the photos that captured that moment are shown here.

When I dress, I do try to look as feminine as possible and there are times when I don’t like what I see in the mirror so I just change it until I do.

There are times when I l am unable to fully dress (make up wig etc.)  so, I just wear a nice full slip with some satin panties around the house.   At these times I do not like to look in the mirror as all I see is a man in women’s underwear.

Oh but when the war paint is on and the curves and hair are perfect wow the mirror becomes your friend again and every so often the image in the mirror takes your breath away.

Vintage Nylon Full Slips.

Yellow 1940/50 Embroidered Full Slip

I have recently embarked upon a buying spree or should I say another buying spree, and the objects of my desire have been vintage nylon full slips.

I have found a wonderful eBay store that sells vintage clothing that includes  slips, mostly by auction with some at buy now prices.

The biggest problem when shopping for slips (any other item of feminine clothing) is finding ones that fit my rather expansive figure.  I can squeeze into a 38 but 40 is more comfortable, I have purchased a couple as large size 42 but they tend to hang a little too loosely. I believe that the allure of a full slip is that it is figure hugging and shows off your curves (and hopeful not too many of your bumps.)   

These larger sizes are less numerous than the smaller 32/34 and when they do come up for auction there can be a lot of competition which obviously drives up the price.  I have had to abandon bidding in many auctions  when the price gets too high. Although I have pushed a few out to the limit to secure something that I really, really wanted.  

Who would believe that there is such a demand for the larger sizes I wonder who could be buying them!!?

There is an added thrill when bidding on a beautiful slip watching and waiting as the days and hours tick by and oh the joy when the auction has ended and the prize is yours or the crushing disappointment when someone sneaks in at the last minute to outbid you.

It is such a shame that these beautiful items often remain hidden beneath our outer clothing.  I love the feeling I get from knowing that, underneath a tight dress or pencil skirt and top, there is a beautiful slip unseen by many, only seen by a few.

I sometimes wear a  slip with a tight pencil skirt without a blouse   under the jacket, the number of open buttons allowing a hint of what lies beneath.

I suppose that my fascination with full slips began when, as a young boy, I would sneak into my mothers’ room and try on hers.

I guess the thrill felt as slinky nylon touches my skin has never left me but today it is more the aesthetic pleasure that fuels my passion.

I have recently totalled up how much I have spent on slips over the past few months and sadly I must put the credit card away, especially if I am to be allowed to buy those new golf clubs, I have been looking at LOL

We do suffer for our art don’t we ladies.


Well here we are in October and yesterday was the first time that Trixy was able to come out and play. It has been a long time but there have been a host of reasons in the tumultuous year that is 2020. Along with pandemics and lock downs the main reason for the lack of Trixy time was that my son, his partner and two young children were living with us.  Well they recently found a house of their own and moved out a few weeks ago, so lots of Trixy time yes, not so fast young lady.

Due to the pandemic my wife is only working one day a week, one day a week is better than none I hear you say, unfortunately her working day coincides with our one remaining live in son’s day off so boohoo no Trixy time  

So yesterday was a special day, it is school holidays here at the bottom of the world and my wife has taken my granddaughter on a road trip to stay on a family dairy farm to help with the calving.

So, yippee Trixy and I have the house to ourselves for a whole week, well in theory.

My wife decided to organize some renovation work to be carried out on out poolside deck while she is away so someone will be working outside most days of the week.

As that someone is a family friend, I cannot just hid Trixy in the house while he is working as he will expect a regular supply of tea.

Over a Sunday dinner and a bottle of port I ascertained from my friend that he didn’t think he would start the work until Wednesday, as my wife would be leaving early Tuesday morning, I saw a small window of opportunity for Trixy time.

IMG_0019Calm before the storm

There was a small chance that my friend would start the work early so I had to plan for such an eventuality. I planned my Trixy day with military precision, I compiled an emergency kit of make-up cleanser, nail polish remover boys’ cloths towels etc. and secreted it in the upstairs bathroom thereby providing a safe space should I be disturbed. Well after a few hours upstairs as Trixy I was increasingly confident that I would not be disturbed and moved the base of operations down stairs.

All was going well until, during a costume change in the downstairs bedroom, our dogs started going ballistic, barking wildly at something or some one at the back door. Assuming the worst I panicked and ran (OK moved as quickly as a girl in four-inch heels can) towards the stairs with the intention of reaching the safety of the bathroom and my emergency pack. I was stopped in my tracks by the voice of my builder friend’s wife’s outside on the deck, realizing that to get to the stairs I would be exposed to anyone standing on the deck, I quickly retreated to the bedroom.

Now I must explain that our house is on the edge of a reserve which is popular with walkers and hikers and my friends wife who was now standing on the deck, regularly walks by our house with her friend and on occasions stops to use the bathroom or for a coffee. As I cowered in our walk-in wardrobe, I heard the two ladies discussing why no one was at home (she had forgotten that my wife was going away) as they walked around the house, they eventual gave up and left I do hope they were able to find a toilet.

While still recovering from the shock of potential discovery I found that the battery in my camera was kaput, not just flat but kaput, bringing a premature end to the photo shoot. 


Killer Heels

I spent the rest of the day just relaxing as Trixy drinking coffee watching TV and basically having a wonderful day.  

As I said earlier it had been over ten months since Trixy was allowed out which meant one’s feet were a little out of condition as regards to stiletto heels. At the end of the wonderful day my feet and calves were begging for mercy but the pain was a happy pain, that was until I played golf the following day. The thought of explaining to my buddies that the reason for my dip in performance towards the end of the round was due to my sore toes and cramping calf muscles from  wearing very high heels for seven hours the previous day.


We do suffer for our art don’t we ladies.

Almost busted again!!!

Today I thought that I would be home alone for a couple of hours. I was undecided if I would dress as there was such a short time available. As I was desperate to try on some recent purchases, I proceeded to get all dressed up less the make-up. Having gone through the agony of getting the body into shape I decided that the face needed some attention. I applied very minimum make up and proceeded with the mini photoshoot, all the time acutely aware of the time pressure.  Thinking that I had until noon to clean up I started the process at 11:15. I was using the upstairs bathroom to remove my lippy and eye make-up with the intention of using the downstairs (better) shower to remove the remaining foundation etc.  At the last minute I decided to use the upstairs shower for the final cleanup.    Imagine my surprise when, on leaving the bathroom in nothing but a towel, I came face to face with my daughter in law who having returned early from her outing was putting our grandson to bed.

There was nothing for her to see but if I had followed through on my original plan, we would have come face to face with my face fully made up less lips and eyes Phew

This, the latest in a string of near misses, has come about as a result of my son and his partner moving in with us to save for a house of their own. This has severely curtailed Trixy time which is why I am taking a few more risks than I normally would with my dressing sessions.

The Magic

The Magic (when does it begin and when does it end)



The magic begins for me during the transition into Trixy at the point when I start to feel like a girl.

I always apply my make up before I get dressed so, after the mandatory close shave (not with the kids coming home early) I sit in front of the makeup mirror and begin.  I  do my make up in the same order, foundation with loads of concealer, eyes, (my wife thinks that my eyes are the most feminine part of my face) and finally my lips. It is with the lips that the magic begins, I spend a lot of time making sure they are perfect (as perfect as I can get them) and when I have finished I only see a girl in the mirror. I don’t have my wig on at this point and in most cases I am only wearing a pair of boxers but I can feel the magic begin.


When does the magic end, it ends during the deconstruction of the feminine me when I remove my wig. The deconstruction is performed in front of a full-length mirror, as I peel off each layer I can only see the girly me in the mirror, eventually I am standing in just my wig a gaff and makeup but the reflection is still a girl.  The spell is finally broken when I remove the wig, with this final act of deconstruction the reflection immediately becomes a man.


If I remove my  wig at the start of the deconstruction the magic ends, no matter how gorgeous and feminine the clothes I am wearing are, without the wig I become a man in a dress and a silly looking man at that.

So, it begins with the lips and ends with the wig, but what happens in between is pure magic.


Who’s a Lucky Girl then?


I am such a lucky girl let me explain why.


My wife works in the duty-free shop of our countries main international airport.  She is   a BA specializing in perfumes and beauty products. Every year her company provides staff with $1000 with which to purchase perfumes and cosmetics at heavily discounted prices. The other evening, I helped my wife make her selections for this year (the order form is spreadsheet based and I have to drive it for her). My wife as usual selected her favorite perfumes and a little make up, I was allowed to add a few things to the list.  When she had finished the total spend was only $820,

“Well.”  she said “you can spend the rest on whatever you want.”

Oh, what a lucky girl I am.


I didn’t need any further encouragement, I added lots of lippy, foundation and eye shadow to the list, the prices were incredible low so I have probably bought enough lippy to last a lifetime.   I have to admit that I was a little sneaky in that as I was setting up the spreadsheet I had a quick look at what was on offer and added a few things to the list before my wife came into the room, so some of the original $820 was for me as well.


I cannot wait for the big box of goodies to arrive


It’s been a while


It has been a while since my last post but the holiday period was very busy and I did not want to risk another near miss with my daughter (I was never a boy scout). So unashamedly this post is all about showing off some of my recent pics.


So, after that unfortunate incident with my daughter I was not able to dress again until 30th Jan Oh my nearly six weeks without Trixy time boo hoo.

Well as this was the first opportunity since the day they arrived these  lovely boots had to take centre stage, only this time paired with a selection of short dresses.

I hope you agree that they look stunning (I know I am too modest).













The long period of inactivity had resulted in my feet becoming very out of condition,  as a result after just a couple of hours in these boots my feet were very sore.  I just need a few more days in heels and they will be match fit again.

The next few pics were without the boots to give my feet a rest




I was never a boy scout



Now you might think that the title of this post is a little weird considering the subject matter is crossdressing but in my home country the motto of the boy scout organisation is “Be prepared” well today I was not a good boy scout because I was not prepared for what was to unfold.

I had  bought a lovely pair of over the knee boots on line which had  arrived over a week ago so I was desperate to wear them.  Christmas and New year was fast approaching so today was probably the last opportunity before the new year to wear them. I could not contemplate waiting another two weeks so I was determined that  today was for Trixy time with my new boots.

What has this got to do with boy scouts I hear you ask  hold on I am getting there.

Down here in the southern hemisphere the school summer holidays have just begun. My daughter, who lives a few minutes away, looks after a few kids during the holidays.  She usually brings them over for a swim in our pool after lunch.  based upon past behavior I  thought that I could squeeze in a couple of hours of Trixy time before she arrived.

Thigh High boots Fantasy bucket list Tick

Everything was going smoothly, I dropped the wife at work as usual and on returning home proceeded to become Trixy.  I was upstairs in my den approximately  10 minutes into the photo shoot when I heard the voice of my granddaughter outside the house, I peeked out of the window and to my horror saw not only my granddaughter but all of my daughter’s charges coming down the driveway in their togs, obviously coming for a swim.

Well to say I panicked would be an understatement   I was trapped upstairs with my daughter and a hoard of kids outside, luckily all the doors were locked and my daughter doesn’t have a spare key.

I had a decision to make do I make a dash down the stairs to the relative safety of the bedroom, risking discovery on the way or wait it out upstairs, knowing that the kids would be around for a couple of hours then leave.  The biggest danger was from my daughter calling me to let her into the house, she could see that I was home as my car was in the drive.

Thigh High boots and Leggings Fantasy Bucket list tick

I know what about the boy scouts, I am nearly there.

In the past during Trixy time I would have a emergency kit of  makeup remover etc  so that I could quickly remove my makeup if disturbed so like a good boy scout I was prepared.

Well today I was a bad boy scout, I did not have my emergency kit so I wasn’t prepared for the situation that I found myself in.

Fortunately, there is a bathroom adjacent to my den so if required I could remove most of the makeup before I made my dash downstairs but my finger nails were a lovely plum colour and the nail polish remover was in the bedroom downstairs.

When my heart rate returned to somewhere near normal I decided that I wasn’t going to waste this opportunity for Trixy time and continued with the photoshoot. (Photoshoot sounds so glamorous it is just me taking a load of pictures with a tripod and a self-timing camera)

So, with one ear listening to the kids in the pool and the other waiting for my phone to ring I continued with the picture taking and the accompanying wardrobe changes.

I also made a few videos in which I explained my dilemma and trying to look relaxed.

After about 60 mins my phone rang it was my daughter I didn’t answer it but decided it was time to make that dash.  Luckily my son’s bedroom is on the first floor and after removing all the girly stuff corset boobs etc I borrowed a t-shirt and a pair of track pants from my son’s room, scrubbed my face almost clean of makeup, stuffed my hand in the pockets and slipped down the stairs into the safety of the bedroom. I re-emerged a few minutes later with clean nails and after a quick shower all traces of Trixy were gone.

I decided not to go outside and talk to my daughter as I didn’t want to explain the missed call, so I made a bit of lunch and returned to the den to start the day’s work.


Well, today was the closed I have come to being discovered, but for that short time when I was posing for pics with the threat of discovery hanging over me, my heart pounding, my throat dry, I felt fantastic, although I don’t think I want to experience anything like that again.


Hugs Trixy

19th December 2017

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